If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5
Loving or Rescuing?
"If you want to determine if you are loving someone or rescuing them, gauge it by how your energy is afterward." John Townsend
Loving or rescuing, also known as helping or enabling, is one of the most challenging issues to discern in life.
It is often found in relationships with those who have addictions to chemical agents or relationships. Think: Sometimes, the drug is another person.
Enabling involves doing something for someone else that they should or could be doing for themselves, which can result in frustration on your part and fruitlessness on theirs.
Helping is when we do something for others that they cannot do without us, resulting in a positive result. A win-win.
Helping should be a catalyst, whereas enabling is a blocker.
Enabling as a blocker keeps others from facing consequences that God will allow them to use, if they choose, to grow and be fruitful.
Love desires and acts in the other's best interest, resulting in freedom, whereas rescuing and enabling allows the other to remain in bondage.
Without a doubt, love energizes, and rescuing will drain you.
Look at each of your relationships:
Are you loving or rescuing, helping, or enabling?
In what ways do you see increased fruitfulness in others’ lives?
What dynamics need to change in relationships that are draining you?
To whom do you need to say…no?
Lord, give us wisdom to love all who struggle with addictions, whether they are chemical agents or relationships. Continue to reveal our hearts as we pursue freedom with them. Amen